I see you there darling. I see you guarding your sea-glass heart, foamy green and specked with red. I know you remember its inception, how it started out crystal-clear and over a lifetime was tossed about in your ocean center. I watched with you as it shattered, all sharp edges and fearful points. I saw you worry that others would be afraid of its knife-edge sharpness, so you threw it to your ocean self and let it get tossed around, cutting up your own tender insides. And now, this sea-glass heart of yours is rough and ragged, but still captivating in its beauty. What are the odds that it would survive being capsized in your internal shipwreck? Only the most stalwart of hearts make it out alive, and now I see you hold your brave heart in your warm palm. Go ahead and tuck it into your pocket for later.
When the moon is full and the candles are lit, take it out of your pocket. Smooth your fingers over it, feeling the rough lines and caressing its sea-worn shape. If you’re feeling even braver, hold it out and let it linger in the night air to be caressed by the salty breeze.
So many of us hold our bruised heart so close, afraid of letting words of life and love weave themselves around it. Afraid of alchemical changes that would, could, desperately want to transform it. There is magic in letting go, in letting transformation happen, even if you need the courage that only whiskey and firelight can bring to help you let go. When the time is right, bring out that bottle of whiskey and light that fire. Bow down your head to the very core of yourself, the one who calls. Stare yourself in the eyes as you bring out your shattered heart. Kiss your reflection as you offer yourself what you think of as a broken memory of completion, and let the truth sink it that what you thought broken is wholly Holy. And as you gaze in wonder at your most sacred heart, full of torment and bruises and midnight phone calls to the only support line you have, let it all fall away. Disrobe your heart and see the naked, beautiful truth it carries.
Be your own savior, the one to arrive with a hammer in one hand and a love letter in the other. Rise up to be the warrior already living inside you. Breathe life into her, for your breath is the last thing for which she waits to feel her own first heartbeat. Let fade away what no longer wishes to stay. Invite in that which will heal you. And you’ll see that your sea-glass heart is perfect the way it is, that nothing else would ever fit the shape you’ve left for it in your hollowed-out center.
Gently let your heart call you home, let its steady rhythm show you the way.